This is Chanel. She was named by my sister, but only loves my dad. When I come home, she looks at me with her devil eyes and bites my ankles. The vet once told my mom that she has a “totem pole of love” and I’m at the bottom. All I want is a dog that loves me, but I’m stuck with this bitch.
Yeah, at first she looks cute, right? That’s what I thought too, until I came home from college for the first time and she tried to rip my eyeballs out of their sockets while I was holding her. I have tried every trick in the book from holding her a lot (Wrong. She claws at me to put her down) to the occasional treat (Fail. When I give her cheese this sneaky bitch pretends to love it but then has diarrhea to spite me). I’ve given up on trying to love her, because I would officially be a masochist.
Essentially, think of the book as “HOW TO TELL IF YOUR CAT IS PLOTTING TO KILL YOU” meets “BOO” + “DOG SHAMING.” She’s like a canine siren that lures you in and then bites your face. Please enjoy “BITCH PLEASE: MY DEVIL POSSESSED DOG IS INCAPABLE OF LOVE”.
Concept of the book would be a mixture of photos and illustrations, and additional photos to those on this tumblr can be easily provided by myself and family members.